Listed below are the best submissions received between March and July, 1997 (OK, so we're a little behind at the moment). Every couple of months, we'll bring to you the best new Magic nicknames, "you've been playing Magic too long" jokes, and cool/funny card creations...
Best Nickname Submissions
Circle of Protection: Artifacts
Bomb Shelter
Submitted by J. Edward Bridgam
Feldon's Cane
The Recycling Program
Submitted by Andrew Brinkley
Kjeldoran Frostbeast
Popsicle gone bad
Submitted by Phil Drisdelle
Mtenda Griffin
Return of the Griffin
Submitted by DiS
Nevinyrral's Disk
Tim's Rampage
Submitted by Phil Garwood
Nicol Bolas
Book Wyrm
Submitted by John Peacock
Ornithoper
The Kite
Submitted by Andrew Brinkley
Reveka, Wizard Savant
Old Mother Tim
Submitted by A.Alexander
Teferi's Isle
Atlantis
Submitted by Kyle Holbrook
Teferi's Puzzle Box
Rubix Cube
Submitted by Rob Bob
Best "You've been playing Magic too long when..." Jokes
you and your friend argue over who is better looking... Serra Angel or Fire Elemental
Traf
You play so often that every Magic player in town knows EXACTLY which deck you're playing as soon as the first land hits the table.
Zopa
When your car gets stolen you say:"Thank god my cards weren't in there!!!"
Zopa
You start wondering what sort of creature you'd be, or at least what your power/toughness would be if you were.
Mishra
When you roll up and smoke a Thallid to see if you start trippin'.
Elmer Egorger
If you find yourself wishing for an Orcish Spy in BlackJack or a Braingeyeser in Uno
Steve Lewis
You go to tournaments to pick girls up
MAD Squirrel
Best Cool/Funny Card Creations
Bridgekeeper - Black Summon [2BB] 1/1
Tap : Sacrifice Bridgekeeper to destroy target Bridge of Death. Bridgekeeper may not be blocked by the Knights of the Round Table or King Arthur. "Wait a minute! I don't know that! Aaaaaaaaaaa!" -- The Bridgekeeper
Submitted by Elmer Egorger
I Can't Believe It's An Artifact! - Mono Artifact [4 colorless]
When "I Can't Believe It's An Artifact" is cast, you must prove that this card is an artifact and that it has 30% less fat and calories than normal artifacts.
Tap : All non- "I Can't Believe It's An Artifact" artifacts in play are destroyed.
"Do you think I'm fat? I shouldn't eat this piece of cake!" -- Serra Angel
Submitted by Sloppy
The O.J. Simpson Defense - Red Instant [2RR]
Play After Defense is Chosen.
Target Oppenent's blocking creatures are all sent to the graveyard. All Attacking creatures phase out.
"I DIDN'T DO IT"
Submitted by John Christian
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