Top Submissions -- March 10, 1998
The Magic Joke Collection

 

          Listed below are the best submissions received between March and July, 1997 (OK, so we're a little behind at the moment). Every couple of months, we'll bring to you the best new Magic nicknames, "you've been playing Magic too long" jokes, and cool/funny card creations... the next list will come out on sometime in May. Enjoy!!

     

    Best Nickname Submissions
      Circle of Protection: Artifacts
      Bomb Shelter
      Submitted by J. Edward Bridgam
      Feldon's Cane
      The Recycling Program
      Submitted by Andrew Brinkley
      Kjeldoran Frostbeast
      Popsicle gone bad
      Submitted by Phil Drisdelle
      Mtenda Griffin
      Return of the Griffin
      Submitted by DiS
      Nevinyrral's Disk
      Tim's Rampage
      Submitted by Phil Garwood
      Nicol Bolas
      Book Wyrm
      Submitted by John Peacock
      Ornithoper
      The Kite
      Submitted by Andrew Brinkley
      Reveka, Wizard Savant
      Old Mother Tim
      Submitted by A.Alexander
      Teferi's Isle
      Atlantis
      Submitted by Kyle Holbrook
      Teferi's Puzzle Box
      Rubix Cube
      Submitted by Rob Bob

 

Best "You've been playing Magic too long when..." Jokes

you and your friend argue over who is better looking... Serra Angel or Fire Elemental

Traf
You play so often that every Magic player in town knows EXACTLY which deck you're playing as soon as the first land hits the table.

Zopa
When your car gets stolen you say:"Thank god my cards weren't in there!!!"

Zopa
You start wondering what sort of creature you'd be, or at least what your power/toughness would be if you were.

Mishra
When you roll up and smoke a Thallid to see if you start trippin'.

Elmer Egorger
If you find yourself wishing for an Orcish Spy in BlackJack or a Braingeyeser in Uno

Steve Lewis
You go to tournaments to pick girls up

MAD Squirrel

 

Best Cool/Funny Card Creations

Bridgekeeper - Black Summon [2BB] 1/1
Tap : Sacrifice Bridgekeeper to destroy target Bridge of Death. Bridgekeeper may not be blocked by the Knights of the Round Table or King Arthur. "Wait a minute! I don't know that! Aaaaaaaaaaa!" -- The Bridgekeeper
Submitted by Elmer Egorger
I Can't Believe It's An Artifact! - Mono Artifact [4 colorless]
When "I Can't Believe It's An Artifact" is cast, you must prove that this card is an artifact and that it has 30% less fat and calories than normal artifacts.
Tap : All non- "I Can't Believe It's An Artifact" artifacts in play are destroyed.
"Do you think I'm fat? I shouldn't eat this piece of cake!" -- Serra Angel
Submitted by Sloppy
The O.J. Simpson Defense - Red Instant [2RR]
Play After Defense is Chosen.
Target Oppenent's blocking creatures are all sent to the graveyard. All Attacking creatures phase out.
"I DIDN'T DO IT"
Submitted by John Christian